I was really drunk.’ I quickly reassured her that it was okay with me, after all I’m sort of proud of this accomplishment. Kara continued with her story replaying the scene for me. The girls of course were full of questions. ‘How?’ ‘Did it hurt?’ ‘What did it feel like?’ ‘How much came out?’ Kara told them all about the first time it happened, how long it had taken, the technique we used, and how she had to relax her entire body. The girls were still somewhat dazed by this information. The game seemed to stall there for a few minutes until Kara’s friend Michelle raised her voice and her eyebrows and said, ‘I’ve never had a threesome.’ Then she slowly raised her glass of wine and took a sip. Her other friend Tammie also took a drink from her glass. ‘Really!’ Kara yelled. ‘Yes. Really,’ they both replied in unison. ‘Wait. Not together?’ Kara asked. ‘Yes,’ said Michelle as Tammie nodded her head too. ‘No! Who was the third person?’ asked Kara in complete astonishment. ‘My ex-boyfriend. “Mom’s death can only be put on me, not you”, I replied back, “It was just another way life is telling me that no matter what I do, I can’t win; I am not allowed to be happy”.“You can be happy; all you have to do is try”.“I have tried”, I whispered back, “Every time I get close, it gets taken away from me; It is to the point that I just want you to be happy”.“I have already found what makes me happy”, Bethany whispered to me.“What” I said back.“Isn’t it obvious? You; you have been there for me since before Mom and Dad got divorced. Remember that time I got pneumonia and you stayed by my bed for two weeks and slept on my floor. Or, when we were riding our bikes and I fell off and broke my ankle. You carried me two miles home. When Mom and Dad divorced you went further by putting me before everything else. I wanted to tell you so many times to live for yourself, but I knew that you wouldn’t go for it. I doubt anyone could, or even would, have done everything you have for me and it makes.
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